Here at Home

Pillowing Punches

You are ugly.

You are worthless.

You don’t deserve to live.

Thoughts are powerful, especially when they pack an emotional punch (or perhaps a literal one). But they are still just thoughts, and a punch is just a punch. Of course it is painful to absorb a psychological or physical blow, even when self-inflicted. But pain is tolerable, so long as there is a deeper, unshakable Love beneath it. Self-destructive thoughts and impulses have substantial roots in our corporeal minds. Discovering our true essence as Presence is not the end of our violent and derogatory habits. Rather, it is the wellspring of strength and wisdom needed so that we may learn to experience pain without becoming engrossed or corrupted by it. If thoughts and fists throw punches, our Presence is the pillow that absorbs them.


(from the book Here at Home)

It happens

“It happens” is more than a hackneyed sticker on a car bumper. It is the dominant motif of our existence. It vindicates every thought and defends every feeling. It upholds our absolute innocence beyond dispute, because it can be said about every single entity and eventuality of Existence. Whether it is an image in our brain, or a stutter from our lips, or a fire in our veins, or a leaf frolicking in the breeze—everything which happens just happens. And if it hurts our ego to admit our absolute ineffectiveness, well that happens too. Or if it imbues our being with the most profound sense of freedom and invulnerability, until we cry from laughter or weep from love and thankfulness—that is also known to just happen.


(from the book Here at Home)

Divine Defiance

This is absolutely unacceptable. I cannot accept this. I cannot, will not, ever give up. I will never bow down. I will never love this. I will paddle upstream. I will cut into the wind, and slice against the grain. I will carve a life out of this atomic clusterfuck called the “universe.” I will brandish my sword towards the heavens, and defy divinity until my last divine breath! And yet, I will live a sacred life, because nowhere is my faith more evident than in defiance of the God to which I have long surrendered.


A truly reverent being knows that God cannot be desecrated, because defiance is, absolutely, a movement of God Itself.


Excerpt from Here At Home, (Last day for free Kindle on Amazon!) 😍

The Stream

Some slothful thoughts on the oneness of Life, and our intangible essence which precedes it 😃

P.S. Three more days of Here at Home free on Kindle 📖 😍!

A Winter Breeze

We don’t have to worry about who we are going to be. There isn’t much choice in the matter. We are going to be human. And we are going to be this human. We needn’t be concerned over the direction of our lives: we are going where this body goes, wherever this mind takes it. And it really is that simple. There are no more decisions, nothing left over which to fret. Life without choice is a breeze. And though it may be a current of December, as life’s winds tend to bite and sting, it is a breeze nonetheless, and any breeze is preferable to the stale and sultry promise of eternal June. We are what we are in each moment, and though the moment may often test our mettle, there is no simpler or more sufferable path than the one we are fated to be on.

Fear is Nothing to Fear!

Excerpt from the book Here At Home, available FREE on Amazon Kindle for a limited time!

I was drowning. One more wave and I would have been done for. Fortunately, my feet touched sand, and I was spared to contemplate my mortality with gasping breath. Someone else died that day, on the same beach, as the twenty-foot waves spared them less mercy.

Everyone has run-ins with mortality, and I am not trying to solicit sympathy for my own. But as I relive those minutes over and over in my mind, I realize that the fact of death is not what plagues me. Rather, it is the fear I felt as I floundered for life, and that gut-wrenching feeling as I surfaced to the absence of my brother, who was getting subaquatically pummeled by the same fatal waves. Death in itself is nothing to fear, because it is not something of which we can form any sort of conception. But fear death we do, simply because it is evolutionarily adaptive for us to do so. And that is okay. No feeling is rational, but each imparts meaning and depth to our experience.

My willingness to return to the ocean comes not from my willingness to face death, but rather to feel the fear in which I was once profoundly submerged. Fear is meant not to deter us from life, but to help us learn from living. Fear prompted me to research the mechanics of the ocean, and how to respond when overwhelmed by powerful breakers (you are supposed to swim toward the wave, rather than away). And while I am certainly more subservient to the mighty sea, I am not afraid to feel the fear in which chest-deep brine immerses me.

What I am trying to say, in too many words, is that death may be nothing to fear, but neither is the ineluctable sensation of fear itself.

The Beauty of Strife

Acceptance, ironically, is all about non-acceptance. Life thrives on contradiction, on clashing desires and polarized energies. Beauty and meaning depend on the conflict of living forms and atomic trajectories. The majesty of the Himalayas wouldn’t grace the earth without the ancient and ongoing strife beneath its surface. Indeed, dissension is at the core of the universe’s most lively and brilliant animations. Learning to concede this reality is paramount to sustaining our spontaneity and faith in the present moment. It allows us to carry forth without the security of certainty or crystallized resolution. Accepting disharmony as a part of life is essential to living in harmony with Life. A handful of different and often divergent energies flow through us at any given moment, and it is not in our best interest to require their reconciliation. That can only lead to further discord. Rather, it is our purpose to hold them all with a dutiful embrace. To love the absence of love. To have faith in a lack of faith. To accept non-acceptance. To step boldly into the brilliant darkness of imperfection.

Excerpt from the book, Here at Homeavailable free on Amazon Kindle for a limited time!

Being Presence

Spirituality is not about “being present.” It is about discovering our nature as Presence!

Tell me your thoughts in the comments! 🙏

FREE Here at Home Kindle 5/28-6/1

Hey everyone! My book, Here at Home will be available for free on Amazon Kindle from May 28 to June 1. If you haven’t already read it, now is your chance! Please spread the word, and share your thoughts with me about the book. Thanks! 🙏

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